Imagine a moment frozen in time, where love takes center stage, unburdened by societal expectations and norms. This is the essence of breaking traditions and designing your own elopement ceremony. It’s a heartfelt rebellion against the conventional, allowing you to create an intimate celebration that speaks to your souls. In this blog, I’ll delve into the allure of breaking traditions, guide you through the process of crafting a personalized elopement ceremony, and explore the various ways to celebrate.

What is an Elopement Ceremony?

An elopement ceremony is an enchanting escape from the traditional wedding narrative. It transcends the grandeur and opulence, focusing instead on the raw beauty of love between two souls. It’s an opportunity to strip away the external noise and immerse yourselves in an intimate experience steeped in authenticity and meaning.

The Appeal of Breaking Traditions

There is an undeniable allure in breaking free from the chains of convention and forging your own path. Here are two captivating reasons why breaking traditions through an elopement ceremony can be so profoundly appealing:

1. Personalization and Intimacy

In the realm of elopements, personalization reigns supreme. Every detail can be tailored to reflect your unique story, from the perfect location to the heartfelt (or hilarious) vows you exchange. By stepping away from the expectations of others, you create a sacred space where your love can live without inhibition. It’s an intimate affair where the focus is solely on the depth of your connection, allowing you to authentically express your love in a way that resonates deeply with both of you.

2. Freedom and Flexibility

Designing your own elopement ceremony grants you the freedom to soar beyond the confines of tradition. Imagine exchanging vows on a secluded beach at sunset, dancing beneath a canopy of stars in a remote forest, or whispering promises to each other on a mountaintop. With an elopement, you have the freedom to choose a location that speaks to your souls. This liberation infuses your ceremony with a sense of awe, as you embrace the joy of breaking free and creating your own extraordinary love story.

Ceremony Traditions and Legalities

The great thing about eloping, as already mentioned, is the freedom to design your ceremony any way you’d like, and throw out all the other “traditions”. A traditional wedding ceremony might follow a format and traditions similar to these:

1. Walking Down the Aisle: The moment when one partner makes their grand entrance, walking down the aisle toward their partner. Traditionally they are walked down the aisle by their father.
2. Giving Away: The symbolic act of a parent or significant family member giving one partner’s hand in marriage to the other, signifying the transition of responsibility and support.
3. Exchange of Rings: The intimate exchange of wedding rings as a symbol of love, commitment, and the eternal bond between the couple.
4. Traditional Vows: The recitation of traditional vows, often derived from religious or cultural traditions, expressing promises of love, loyalty, and lifelong partnership.
5. Unity Candle Ceremony: The lighting of a unity candle, where the couple uses individual candles to ignite a larger candle together, symbolizing the merging of their lives and families.
6. Sand Ceremony: The pouring of two different-colored sands into a single container, representing the blending of two lives into one, which cannot be easily separated.
7. Reading of Poems or Scriptures: The inclusion of readings or passages from poetry, literature, or religious texts that celebrate love, offer guidance, or reflect the couple’s values and beliefs.
8. First Kiss: The eagerly anticipated and emotional moment when the couple seals their vows with a kiss, symbolizing their newfound marital bond.

If any of these traditions resonate with you, include them! If they don’t, however, toss them out. You get to choose what to include in your ceremony. You’ll need to do a bit of research on your location specifically, but there are usually very few things legally required for your ceremony. Here are the most common:

1. Obtaining a Marriage License: Check into the license requirements for your location (not where you’re from, but the place you’ve chosen to get married). These vary, but generally you have to plan ahead a bit.
2. Choose an Authorized Officiant: Select an authorized officiant who will solemnize your marriage. This can be a religious leader, a justice of the peace, or someone else recognized by your local government. Their role is to guide you through the emotional exchange of vows and officially declare you as a married couple. Many eloping couples have a friend who obtains the required authorization to officiate their ceremony, and in some places you aren’t required to have an officiant at all. Again, check the laws for where you’re getting married.
3. Witnessing the Ceremony: Some locations require having witnesses present during your ceremony, some do not. If you want your elopement to be completely private your photographer can often be your witness. Just confirm the specific requirements with the local jurisdiction.

Again, the legalities will vary depending on the location you choose, but as long as you’ve covered your bases legally you can design your ceremony in absolutely ANY way you choose. Here is a list of some unique things you can choose to include (or not!) in your elopement:

Designing Your Ceremony Your Way

Once you’ve covered your bases legally and decided if you’re including any traditional elements to your ceremony you can start customizing your day. Couples often have questions, like:

• We’re not having a traditional ceremony, do we say vows?
• Is there anything we have to say or do to be “official”?
• We’re not religious, can we have a non-religious ceremony?

The best answer I can give you is: you can (and I think you should) do exactly what you and your partner want to do during your elopement ceremony. Nothing more, nothing less. The beautiful thing about eloping in the first place is the freedom to do what fits YOU two as a couple, not what tradition dictates. Since you’ve taken the wild step to toss tradition to the wind and get married in a way that is completely unique to you, run with it! I encourage you to have exactly the ceremony you’ve both always wanted by including whichever unique traditions, celebrations, and bits that mean something to the two of you.

Here are some beautiful and fun things you could include (or not!) in your elopement ceremony:

Crafting Meaningful Vows

Your marriage vows are powerful. They are not just words; they are a profound reflection of the connection that binds your souls together. Your vows are a testament to the unique love story between you, free from rigid conventions. In an elopement, vows become an intimate and authentic expression of your deepest emotions.

Some couples opt to surprise each other with their vows, while others choose to write them collaboratively. The beauty lies in the freedom to craft them in a way that resonates with your hearts. Whether you choose to carefully write your vows in custom vow books or scribble them on notepaper, what truly matters is the authentic feeling behind every word. There is no predetermined right or wrong method to create your vows; it is an individual and personal journey.

Your vows can encompass the solemnity and depth of profound emotions, or they can be filled with lighthearted humor. Let go of any pressure to adhere to a prescribed formula. Instead, write from the heart. Know that these words will echo eternally in your memories, a constant reminder of the promises that sealed marriage.

Sage Ceremony

How perfect to start your marriage off right by cleansing bad energy, and replacing it with positive, healing energy through a sage-smudging ceremony. The actual ceremony is fairly simple, you only need a bundle of sage, a way to light it, and a bowl. You can burn sage and allow the smoke to envelop you, symbolizing the release of negative energy and the invitation of positivity and blessings into your union.

You can choose to have your officiant guide the ceremony, whether with a prayer, blessing, or affirmation, or you two can share it quietly just between the two of you with a personal prayer or affirmation.

The sage ceremony serves as a powerful testament to your commitment to each other and the sacredness of your love. It is a beautiful reminder that love can be an alchemical force, transforming and purifying, as you step into a future illuminated by the essence of sage’s wisdom and blessings.

Handfasting Ritual

This ancient Celtic tradition beautifully symbolizes the binding of your love and union. While these ceremonies can be tailored to your preferences, it is common for an officiant to assist in the act of tying a braided rope around your clasped hands. However, if you choose to self-solemnize and prefer not to have an official officiant present, I (your photographer or your vendor team) can assist in performing this part of the ceremony, or you can gracefully wrap the braid around your hands together, a testament to your unwavering teamwork.

This can also be a great opportunity to include guests (if you’ve invited them) in your ceremony. They are invited to say a personal blessing while tying their own mini cord around your hands. This beautiful gesture allows your loved ones to feel intimately connected, as if they are physically and emotionally joining you together on this sacred day.

Incorporating this tradition into your elopement ceremony is a unique way to foster a sense of unity and inclusion, making your guests feel an integral part of your journey as they symbolically unite you both, intertwining your lives in a profound and everlasting bond.

Reiki Practice

Immerse your ceremony in healing energy by incorporating a Reiki practice. You could enlist the expertise of a skilled Reiki practitioner to perform energy healing on you as a couple, creating a profound sense of balance, harmony, and spiritual connection as you embark on your journey together.

Through the art of Reiki, you’ll create a sacred space where the energies of love and unity intertwine. This harmonious infusion of healing energy sets the stage for a marriage rooted in profound spiritual connection, bringing forth a renewed sense of vitality and alignment.

Unity Ceremonies

Unity ceremonies are profound expressions of the choice to merge your life with your partner. The true magic of a unity ceremony lies in its limitless possibilities, as it can take on any shape or form that resonates with your unique love story.

Traditionally, a unity ceremony symbolizes the fusion of two separate elements into a singular entity, often representing the notion that together, you become stronger and more resilient. While some couples opt for the tradition of lighting a unity candle (though challenging outdoors), others choose to take their unity ceremony in a different direction.

Think about who you two are as a couple, and create your own unique unity ceremony. Some couples have merged bottles of red and white wine, mixed two liquids that represented their unique endeavors, or even painted two separate canvases in distinct colors, then blended them together while the paint was still wet. Don’t just consider the ceremony itself, but also what may result from it (ie. a unique piece of art for your home, or a plant you’ve planted together).

With a unity ceremony tailored to your unique love story, you create a lasting symbol of togetherness and a treasured keepsake that resonates with the depth of your bond.

Plant a Tree Together

Mark this moment of growth and new beginnings as you embark on your journey together by planting a tree during your ceremony. While planting you establish a powerful connection between your relationship and the thriving life that unfolds before you. The tree becomes a living symbol of the strength, resilience, and enduring love that will grow alongside your partnership.

You can always celebrate anniversaries by revisiting the tree you planted together to witness its growth and transformation over time, and it serves as a constant reminder of the commitment you have made to nurture and care for each other. Together, you embark on a shared journey of growth and evolution, where every leaf and branch represents the beautiful milestones and cherished memories you create along the way.

Ring Warming

If you’ve invited guests to your elopement you can elevate the emotional depth of your ceremony by incorporating a ring warming ritual. This inclusive gesture involves passing your rings through the hands of each guest, allowing them to silently bestow their well wishes, blessings, and love. As the rings traverse through their hands, they become infused with a collective energy of positivity and support, symbolizing the profound connection between your loved ones and the commitment you are making.

During the exchange of rings, you carry with you the warmth and love shared by each guest. The ring warming ritual not only invites your loved ones to actively participate in your ceremony, but also creates a tangible bond between them and the timeless symbols of your love and unity. As you wear your rings, you will forever be reminded of the blessings and the enduring connection shared with your loved ones.

Post-Ceremony Celebrations

After the elopement ceremony, couples often choose to celebrate in unique and memorable ways. From tossing confetti and flower petals to popping champagne and embracing the thrill of screaming from mountaintops, it’s totally up to you. Just remember to respect nature and follow the leave no trace principles.

This is your day, so toss that confetti! Throw flower petals or seeds! Pop a champagne bottle and toast your elopement. If you choose confetti, consider using a biodegradable option so you don’t need to spend forever cleaning up every scrap. If you toss petals or seeds just choose native varieties to preserve the ecosystem. And don’t hold back when popping that champagne bottle—shake it vigorously for an explosive celebration.

The choice is yours to make your elopement celebration truly unforgettable. Let your hearts guide you and create moments that reflect your love and joy on this special day.

Breaking traditions and designing your own elopement ceremony is a profound act of love and self-expression. It is an invitation to delve deep into the essence of your relationship and create an experience that encapsulates the raw beauty of your love story. By embracing personalization, freedom, and intimacy, you create a memory that will embed itself into your hearts. Your elopement ceremony becomes a testament to the extraordinary power of love and a celebration of the unique connection you share.

FAQs

1. Q: Can we still have a traditional element in our elopement ceremony? A: Absolutely! Your elopement ceremony is all about personalization, but if there’s a specific tradition you hold dear, you can incorporate it in a way that aligns with your overall vision.
2. Q: Is it possible to have a theme for our elopement ceremony? A: Yes, having a theme adds a unique touch to your ceremony. Whether it’s a whimsical fairytale, rustic bohemian, or elegant vintage, let your chosen theme guide your décor, attire, and overall ambiance.
3. Q: How can we ensure our elopement ceremony is legal and recognized? A: Check the legal requirements for marriage in your jurisdiction and ensure that you follow the necessary procedures, such as obtaining a marriage license and having a registered officiant present.
4. Q: Can we have guests at our elopement ceremony? A: Absolutely! While eloping traditionally involves a smaller guest list, you can still invite close family members or a small group of friends to witness and celebrate your special day.
5. Q: What should we consider when planning our elopement ceremony timeline? A: Consider the time of year, weather conditions, and any travel logistics when setting your elopement ceremony date. Also, allow ample time for each aspect of the ceremony, including preparation, the ceremony itself, and post-ceremony celebrations.

Get in touch with me and let me help you create a wildly unique elopement experience that’s all your own.

Stay Wild. xx