Plan Your Elopement
ar·che·type
/ˈärk(ə)ˌtīp/
The original. The one others will try to copy. Tailored to you two alone.
Getting married the same way everyone else does just doesn’t appeal to you two. You’re excited to venture into uncharted territory, as long as it’s an experience and as long as it speaks to the two of you.
Elopements
rchetype
A
Elope
Define
Couples who choose to have an intentionally intimate wedding celebration that is authentic to them, and where the focus is actually about you two as a couple.
Intentional
Focused on You as a couple
Intimate
WHat do you mean, Elope?
Elopements are rooted in intention. Intentionally intimate, intentionally meaningful, an authentic reflection of your relationship with a sole focus on you and your partner
When you hear the word "elopement" what is the first thing you think of? Is it a couple sneaking off to a courthouse to get married? Or a last-minute flight to Vegas for drunken vows in front of Elvis in a chapel on the strip?
If this (or anything similar) was your first thought you're not alone. This was the meaning of an elopement at one point, but that's not the case anymore.
Now elopements are intimate weddings rooted in intention. Big, traditional weddings are beautiful, but they're not a fit for every couple. Your wedding day is truly only about you two committing your lives to each other, and the day itself should be an authentic reflection of your relationship.
An elopement is about stripping away all of the pressure, obligation, or anxiety you've ever felt about a wedding day. It is the absolute freedom to commit your life to your partner however, wherever, and with whomever you choose.
Elopements are for lonely or isolated people without friends and family
Myth 1
There's this old preconceived notion that if a couple chooses to get married and not invite hundreds of friends and family members (or random acquaintances of their third cousin...) that they probably don't have these types of relationships at all.
This is NOT the case
Oftentimes the couples who choose to elope absolutely have very strong friendships and solid family relationships backing them up but they've still chosen a very intimate wedding.
Why?
Because getting married is about the two of them. That's it. So they've designed their wedding to be intimate (only them, or very few people in attendance) intentionally to keep their relationship at the forefront of the celebration.
An elopement or intimate wedding is about choosing to put the love you have for your partner (how and where you say your vows) ahead of things that might not matter as much to you (think, a big party where you're the center of attention). Instead you're choosing to make your day about the two of you, not about planning a party you might be stressed about, that comes with lots of obligation.
An elopement isn't about excluding people or telling your loved ones you don't care about them and want them with you - it's just choosing to focus on intention and the things that mean the most to you as a couple. That's the whole point.
Traditionally, people tend to think of elopements and intimate weddings as low-budget options, and that couples who choose this do so because they cannot afford the expense of a traditional wedding.
Sure, maybe this is the case sometimes, (and if you do choose to elope you probably will end up saving some money compared to what you'd spend for a traditional wedding) but it definitely isn't the rule. You can have a huge wedding and invite tons of people on a low-budget, and you can also choose an elopement with a high-budget.
In reality, eloping instead of having a traditional wedding isn't about saving money at all, rather it's about choosing to invest in your day in a different way.
Many couples choose to elope simply because they want their wedding day to be a true reflection of their relationship, and for a lot of people that might not mean hosting a big party. (to some that sounds completely opposite of who they are!)
For some couples a day that will bring them joy might be a day spent doing something they love together, like hiking an amazing new trail, exploring a beloved city and sampling the local cuisine, or boating to the perfect spot and diving or snorkeling.
These couples might choose to share their vows on top of a mountain with the sunset in the background, or in a private spot they found together during one of their explorations.
Couples who choose to elope aren't doing it just to save money - they're doing it because they want to spend an intentional day with the person who means the most to them.
Myth 2
People Elope because they don't want to invest money in their wedding day
With this one we're back to the preconceived notion of the "courthouse sneak-away wedding" where the couple chooses to get married in secret because they're ashamed, embarrassed, or think their loved ones won't approve of their decisions.
Again, maybe this was true in the past, but it simply isn't anymore.
All of the couple's we've served who have chosen to elope, or have a very intimate wedding didn't do so because they were hiding their marriage. Not at all. Their choice instead was to set aside some of the pressure, anxiety, and expectations that sometimes go hand-in-hand with a traditional wedding, and get married in a way that is a more authentic fit to them as a couple.
When you choose to elope you've chosen not to compromise. You're instead choosing intentional, meaningful moments with your partner, and an experience that will speak deeply to you both. There's absolutely nothing shameful about that.
True, some people won't understand, but that's the point. Your wedding day is a day for you and your chosen partner, it really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.
Myth 3
Elopements are for unapproved or shameful marriages
Elopements used to be considered as these secret, covert affairs that nobody could attend because that would break the "rules". Thank goodness that's not the case!
Want the truth? There are no rules to an elopement. You can absolutely elope with loved ones in attendance, whoever you want to be there should be there!
Bring you mom. Bring your best friend (and if this is your dog, YES, bring your dog!), bring your kids. Bring whoever YOU want to share in this moment with you.
There isn't a defined guest count that makes your wedding "count" as an elopement. When we got married we chose to have an intimate destination wedding with 25 people total in attendance, and it was perfect. We were able to enjoy and experience each and every moment of the day together with the people closest to us in the world.
The trick to keeping your day an elopement is to be very direct with your chosen guests about your intentions, and not compromising.
Again, it's all about intention.
Myth 4
Elopements can only include the two of you
There's this old preconceived notion that if a couple chooses to get married and not invite hundreds of friends and family members (or random acquaintances of their third cousin...) that they probably don't have these types of relationships at all.
This is NOT the case
Oftentimes the couples who choose to elope absolutely have very strong friendships and solid family relationships backing them up but they've still chosen a very intimate wedding.
Why?
Because getting married is about the two of them. That's it. So they've designed their wedding to be intimate (only them, or very few people in attendance) intentionally to keep their relationship at the forefront of the celebration.
An elopement or intimate wedding is about choosing to put the love you have for your partner (how and where you say your vows) ahead of things that might not matter as much to you (think, a big party where you're the center of attention). Instead you're choosing to make your day about the two of you, not about planning a party you might be stressed about, that comes with lots of obligation.
An elopement isn't about excluding people or telling your loved ones you don't care about them and want them with you - it's just choosing to focus on intention and the things that mean the most to you as a couple. That's the whole point.